This always makes me both laugh and feel nostalgic. Don't know who to credit for it, its done the rounds on Facebook I don't know how many times, but whoever you are out there, thank you. This is great!
"Having trouble readjusting to life back at home now that the travelling is over? Here are 9 handy hints to help you settle back in:
1) Replace your bed with two or more bunk beds, and every night invite random people to sleep in your bedroom with you. Ensure at least one person talks in their sleep and at least two people snore like trains. Remove beds one by one as symptons improve.
2) Sleep in your sleeping bag, forgetting to wash it for months. Add some bugs in order to wake up with many unsightly bites over your arms and legs.
3) Enlist the help of a family member to set your radio alarm to go off randomly during the night, filling your room with loud talking. This works best if the station is foreign. Also have several mobiles ringing, without being answered (at least one should have the default Nokia ring). To add to the illusion, ask a friend to bring plastic bags into your room at roughly 6am and proceed to rustle them for no apparent reason for a good half hour.
4) Keep all your clothes in a rucksack. Remember to smell them before puting them on and reintroduce the use of the iron SLOWLY.
5) Buy your favourite food, and despite living at home, write your name and when you might next be leaving the house on all bags. Your food should include mainly pasta, two minute noodles, cans of food with very plain labels, apples and chocolate.
6) Ask a family member to every now and again steal an item of food, preferably the one you have most been looking forward to or the most expensive. Keep at least one item of food far too long or in a bag out in the sun.
7) Even if it's a Sunday, vacate the house by 10am, and then stand on the corner of the street looking lost. Ask the first passer-by of similar ethnic background if they have found anywhere good to go yet.
8) When sitting on public transport (the London Tube would be ideal) introduce yourself to the person sitting next to you, say which stop you got on at, where you are going, how long you have been travelling and what university you went to. If they say they are going to Morden, say you met a guy on the central line who said it was terrible and that you've heard Parsons Green is better and cheaper.
9) Stick paper in your shower so that the water comes out in just a drizzle. Adjust the hot/cold taps at regular intervals so that you are never fully satisfied with the temperature. Because of this frustration, shower infrequently.
These simple but effective instructions should help you fall back into normal society with the minimum effort."
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